5 Ways To Begin Dealing With Divorce

Divorce is undoubtedly one of life's most challenging transitions, marked by emotional turbulence, uncertainty, and profound changes. We need all the help we can get to navigate this incredibly challenging chapter in our lives. Here are five tips for surviving divorce, particularly in those first few months.

1. Feel the Feelings Without Judgment

You will feel all of the emotions. From grief to anger and rage, to sadness, depression, confusion, and loneliness. It's normal to experience all of these feelings. Allow yourself the space, time, and grace to feel these feelings without judgment. Lean on friends, family, mental health professionals, and support groups. Anybody who can provide a space for you to share what you are feeling.

2. Prioritize You First

Divorce and/or separation will take their toll on all areas of your life. It will feel overwhelming at times, and it’s compounded losses that seemingly hit all at once. You have to prioritize self-care. I cannot stress or underline this enough. You have to prioritize self-care. Get enough sleep. Eat as well as you can. Get outside. Walk. Get that sunshine. Breathe. Get some solid routines dialed in because they will help give you some sense of stability when everywhere else in your life will feel upside down. Laugh. Watch stand-up comedy specials. This is survival time like no other. Do what you need to do for you first.

3. Therapy Helps

A good therapist will make a huge difference not only in getting you through this divorce but in setting you up for whatever comes next. You will need to identify coping strategies and therapists can help with that. They can offer perspective, guidance, and resources tailored to your specific situation. Talk to a professional if at all possible. I know that there is still some stigma around this (although that has changed dramatically than God), but go out and seek that help. That is a sign of strength. Trust me.

4. Support Support Support

Surrounding yourself with a strong support system is crucial during divorce. Share your feelings and concerns with trusted friends and family members who can provide emotional support. Joining support groups or seeking out individuals who have experienced similar situations can offer a sense of camaraderie and understanding. Establishing connections with others who have walked a similar path can provide insights, coping mechanisms, and the reassurance that you are not alone. I cannot stress this enough. Having people around you who know what you are going through is a life saver. This was the smartest thing I did year one- getting a lot of people around me who were either in the trenches with me or had gone through it before.

5. The Future

While divorce signifies the end of one chapter, it also marks the beginning of new opportunities for growth and self-discovery. I know that this isn’t something you can hear at the beginning. It takes time to be able to see that this is in fact the truth. But trust me, there is a future for you that you may not be able to see yet. And that’s ok. That’s normal. That written, once you can see a bit of light I urge you to be selfish with this time. Use it for your growth. Take classes, go deep into hobbies, travel, explore, and discover new passions. It’s a blank canvas and although that will make you cry your eyes out in the beginning it will become something you will hopefully take advantage of and celebrate at some point down the line.

Lean In

Dealing with divorce is a process that requires time, patience, and self-compassion. Be kind to yourself. Love yourself. Feel the feelings, get that support, and create some healthy routines.